So, I haven’t blogged in what seems like forever, I’ve been super duper busy with cold after sickness bug after flu after sickness bug after cold after norovirus and a touch of the terrible two’s. Lily, not me. I wanted my first post of the new year to be a positive, uplifting one, I was browsing through my feed and came across the #RockingMotherhood tag that begun with Patricia over at White Camellias
We’re all aware of the mums who make parenting look like a walk in the park, who have their shit together, who actually find the time to fix their hair and make-up in a morning whilst their perfectly well behaved children give them zero hassle. Where as me, I actually like to hear about the struggles other mums have, it reminds me that I’m not alone when Lily throws a monster strop, that she’s not the only child that will smack me in frustration, scream and false cry when I say ‘no’ and that she’s not actually behind in her development when you read a post about the mum who’s child has potty trained way earlier than your child did, or a post about the child who can count to 20 when your child can only count to 10. Do me a favour. I remember reading a post once from Emilyandthegirlsx about her little girl having a tantrum and I was over the moon to read something like that, I could have jumped for joy (sorry Emily!) not at the struggle Emily had that day, but because someone else had the balls to post something that didn’t just portray parenting and their children as a doddle, praise the lord for the likes of Emily and little E. Living with anxiety means I can get so caught up in those sort of posts, especially with Lily being premature, I worry a lot about her keeping up with others her age, and I get anxious over me being the best mummy I can be. That’s why I’m glad I came across #RockingMotherhood, it’s given me the opportunity to think about the finer details of parenting and mine and Lily’s relationship, and I think that’s how it should be. We all need to give ourselves credit sometimes.
So here goes, 10 reasons why I’m rocking the ass off motherhood…
1. I’ve always taught Lily to be well mannered and kind, and that will be something that I enforce for keeps. I haven’t always been, but since becoming a parent I’m very much a ‘do something for nothing’ person and I want Lily to be the same, even to those who are nasty to her throughout life (lets not sugarcoat it – it will happen), those sorts of people often need it the most. To my credit, she’s pleasant and even shares her sweets and chocolate which is a huge deal!
2. ‘My best friend’. I’ve found the balance between being mummy first and best friend second. I’m teaching Lily to be open with me, it’s important she grows up to know that her parents won’t judge her and that she always has us to turn too, but it’s equally as important that she understands I am her mum and I will go to extreme lengths to look out for and protect her.
3. I’ve taught Lily to choose books over her iPad. She has both, and the iPad is great for postponing tantrums when we’re doing the foodshop or out for tea, and there are some great learning apps these days, but I’d much prefer to sit with Lily and read a good book to get her imagination going wild. Daddy is the main book reader in our house, Lily likes to sit next to him on the sofa and read when he gets in from work. Books aren’t just for bedtime in our house 🙂
4. I understand Lily language. Only mummy knows that “shuuush” means shoes, “tertie” means Bertie (nannys dog) and not that she’s dirty, nobody knows or understands Lily like I do, and I advocate well.
5. I’m a teacher, nurse, advocate, referee, chef, cleaner, on tap hug giver, life coach, and so many more random jobs rolled in to being a mum. I’ve learned to have the patience of a saint.
6. I’m not afraid to discipline Lily. Disciplining a child is a controversial subject, I know. I’m a firm believer that discipline is about a child learning rather than punishment. “Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder. – Rumi” I love that quote, I believe children learn more from their guardians actions and that includes voice raising. It’s difficult sometimes, on the really bad days where you just want to shout “stop it” for the 100th time at the top of your lungs but Lily will learn more from being put on her naughty chair with me explaining why and how what she’s done is wrong. I’m very much the strict parent where as A is the soft one.
7. Lily comes first, her wants and needs are put before mine always.
8. Lily has clung on to my hair for dear life since the day she was born, that’s her comfort despite it leaving me with real thin hair and really bad headaches day in day out, but here I am, still going strong with an (almost) two year old hanging off my hair. I’ve learned to get on with the daily tasks of life with Lily attached to either my hair, hip or legs. I’m queen of the multi-tasking!
9. I make time for family, for us, for bonding. We lead crazy life styles where I do my own thing, A does his and Lily has her clubs, but I always make sure we have family time and that’s the best time 🙂
10. I make sure Lily knows I love her, our household doesn’t fall short on the affection front, at all. No matter what sort of day we have had I don’t go to sleep without kissing Lily goodnight and telling her that I love her more than anything in the whole wide world. Lily is my world.
So that’s just an insight as to why I know I’m rocking motherhood’s ass. I tag, Emily from Emilyandthegirlsx and Heidi from Heidieverall to do the same.